The Questionnaire

"Maybe I'd just go back to a time where there was no AIDS, so I could fuck everyone guilt-free."

What are you doing these days?
Well, I’ve just released my second song on iTunes entitled ‘Love You Better‘. I’m pretty focussed on that, and my upcoming music.

What turns you on creatively?
It’s kinda hard to differentiate what turns me on creatively, from what turns me on in general.. but if it’s for a video, I always say Idiots Inspire me. If it weren’t for idiots and my problems with them, I would never be pissed off enough to make a video.

If you were a mind-reader whose mind would you like to read?
Every pervert’s mind I know. Then again, I’d need to carry a really big purse to hide my boner. I get turned on easily.

If you could travel in time, which era would you visit?
To the time when people least gave a fuck what people think. However, that day may be future-tense now that I think about it. Hmm. Maybe I’d just go back to a time where there was no AIDS, so I could fuck everyone guilt-free.

What is your favorite sound?
Hearing my name being called out during sex. Or at Starbucks, when my coffee is ready. Both are equally orgasmic.

What is the album or song that influences you the most?
My favorite songs are Courtney Love -- Never Gonna Be The Same and Fiona Apple’s ‘I know’.

Who would you like to collaborate with? And why?
Courtney Love, because I feel an instinctual bond and have ever since I laid eyes on her. We both understand the beauty of being black sheep.

What drives you crazy?
Intolerant people, or people that just refuse to listen to me talk. I like to talk a lot and only like to listen a little.. so if someone isn’t willing to hear my point, I will start shouting.

What makes you laugh?
Calling my friends ugly, but not meaning it.. but them still thinking I mean it. I find humor in coming off as an asshole to people, and them not realizing I’m serious. I’m unhinged. What can I say?

If you had 3 wishes what would they be?
1. to get all the hair zapped off my face.
2. to get boobs.
3. to die with a boner.

What is the craziest thing you ever did?
Hmm. Gotten a handjob on a plane, probably. At the time it didn’t seem risky to me, but looking back, it was. Then again, it was a red eye and everyone was passed out around us, so maybe it wasn’t that crazy. I mean, we did have a blanket over us. I don’t know. I can’t measure my craziness.

What makes you feel embarrassed?
Reading past interviews, as I’m sure I’ll do with this one in the future.

What are your favorite web-sites (not including the ones that you are participate in)?
I’m really into Xtube.. and Redtube.. and gaytube.

What is the silliest thing you have ever done?
Tried being straight in 5th grade. THAT was pretty silly.

How would you make the world a better place?
By getting rid of AIDS so we can all get back to fucking each other the way we SHOULD be fucking each other.

What is your biggest weakness?
Sex

Where will you be in 10 years?
Either 6 feet under ground, or 6 feet in the air, on my high horse as a big shot know-it-all entertainment guru.

Write a question that you like to ask yourself and answer it.
Chris, what is your favorite sexual position? I like fucking them from the side with their leg up, but that’s just me..

Associations
Love - blind, death, dumb, heartless. Basically lacks any of the 5 senses.
Death - is life.
God - is not what you/i/we think.
TV - is so 90′s.
Family - war.
Politics - war.
Internet - war.
Happiness - struggle
Fame - poison
YouTube - corporate
Chris Crocker - unequivocal

Chris Crocker is an Internet celebrity with a popular YouTube channel. He is best known for this video:

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